Blog Posts: baby
Sweet, Soft-Spoken Client
Emerald was a sweet, soft-spoken young woman who did not want to disappoint her parents with an unplanned pregnancy. She never envisioned herself in this situation. She lives with her parents, attends school, and her life is in order. Her ultrasound showed she was 7 ½ weeks pregnant and at her request, a registered nurse walked her through what the abortion options at that stage would be like.
All she kept thinking about was that her parents would kick her out. She also wasn’t sure the father of the baby is the one for her and doesn’t believe he will stick around. Emerald said, “…I don’t want to live my life knowing I had an abortion, but my parents will probably kick me out when they find out I’m pregnant. I feel everything is against me and my only choice is abortion.”
After the ultrasound, we sat down and Emerald took a deep breath. I was able to walk her through different scenarios and take a realistic look at her circumstances. Would her parents really kick her out? Would they allow her to live on the streets? Emerald was able to see that her fear was driving the abortion. Yes, her parents are going to be upset, but most likely will support her and the new baby.
As she left, she hadn’t made a firm choice. She needed to think about it a bit. I told her things have a way of changing when we are more calm and that we would be here for her anytime she needed to come in and talk... no matter what she decided.
I later heard from Emerald and she thanked me for talking to her about the options for her and her baby. She now sees a light at the end of the tunnel and looks forward to holding her baby.
When “Jessie” came to PCC, she was very conflicted about her pregnancy, which was her 4th. She is in her mid 20’s and she already has two children. She was worried about not being able to give her other kids the things she considered they need. On the other hand, Jessie is still feeling bad about the child she aborted five years ago. Her entire family including her husband and friends encouraged her to have this baby.
While weighing the risks, benefits and consequences of having another abortion, Jessie had called two abortion clinics and had a pregnancy test taken at one of them. Jessie asked God to help her decide what to do. When she came to the PCC, the Client Advocate listened carefully to Jessie’s concerns, and shared information and resources to help her sort out her conflicted feelings. Jessie listened thoughtfully when the Client Advocate informed her that open adoption would be a good alternative if she thought she could not afford another child.
After several days, Jessie returned to the PCC clinic with her mother, for an ultrasound. When they saw the baby and noticed its heart beating, Jessie had a flashback to the ultrasounds she had of her other babies. Jessie told the nurse she would definitely carry and keep this new baby. She was happy with her choice—no more conflicted feelings.
A couple of weeks before her baby girl was due, Jessie came in for material assistance. She had been in and out of the hospital with contractions, so there was no time for a baby shower. Thanks to generous donors, the PCC gave her a stroller, bassinet, bath tub as well as clothes, blankets, diapers, wipes, lotion, bottles, bibs, socks, crib sheets and bath towels. She was entered on the list for a crib, and the PCC was able to give her one when the baby was 3 months old. Now, we get to see Jessie, her baby girl and her other kids once a month when she returns for diapers and other supplies. She looks a little tired, but very happy with her young beautiful family!
They have been best friends for years, share all their secrets with each other, and do practically everything together. They attend the same junior college, share the same goal of finishing school, and hope for successful careers. They felt unstoppable and carefree until today.
Together they arrive at the Pregnancy Counseling Center, scared and confused, both fearing that they might be pregnant. Neither one feels ready to be a mother. Neither one has the support of her boyfriend. Neither girl expects any help from her family. Amid tears and anxious hand holding, they await the results of their pregnancy tests.
One girl “Felicia” is pregnant; her best friend “Deborah” is not. “This is so unreal, I just knew it would be me,” says Felicia. She is leaning towards abortion, but knows she will feel badly about it.
An ultrasound is performed, and the moment Felicia sees her baby’s heartbeat, the pregnancy becomes real. She asks for her best friend, Deborah, to join her in the room.
“Oh my... is that your baby?” Deborah exclaims when she sees the monitor. “It’s really a baby,” she says softly. After the ultrasound, Felicia says she can no longer consider abortion. In this safe and caring environment at the PCC, Felicia is able to hear and see the truth, and choose life. Her best friend hugs her, and pledges her help and support.
Felicia will not be alone. Along with her best friend’s help, she will also have the full support of everyone here at the Pregnancy Counseling Center. Doctor referrals will be provided so she can begin prenatal care, and we promise to help her with monthly material assistance.
These best friends leave the PCC as two young women who have been profoundly changed by today’s shared experience.